Thanks for sharing.
I only know
MY perspective,
so I can’t presume
what living as a human
feels like for others.
I’ve always felt disconnected
to and from those around me.
From my
present perspective,
it seems that
when I was younger
I believed
that being disconnected
wasn’t something
humans were
SUPPOSED to be.
So I filled myself with sorrow,
and did whatever it took
to not feel so disconnected.
Then I found
that even when I was
interacting with others,
or tripping out on imagination,
I STILL felt disconnected.
This seemingly brought
EVEN MORE sorrow,
and a desire to compensate.
The “problem,” as it turns out,
wasn’t that I was disconnected,
but rather that I believed
that I was SUPPOSED to be connected.
By seeming choice,
I had a NEED for connection.
Did I need this?
I imagined what it might feel like
to be OKAY with disconnectedness.
I became a Space Monkey.
From this perspective,
I began to imagine
that I wasn’t disconnected at all;
that all I perceive
is already ONE with me.
From my younger perspective,
I would have judged
this Space Monkey as delusional.
And that is fine,
for my younger perspective
of disconnectedness
led me precisely
to where I am now.
So I am glad that I had
that self-pitying
miserable experience.
It has led me to believe
that I am infinitely more
than just self.
And so I became connected
from the INSIDE
rather than the OUTSIDE.
You can call it faith.
In whatever.
And so I know now
not to oppose
wherever I seem
to be leading my self.
Even if it’s down a hole.
Or into space.
We are Space Monkey.
2/8
Space Monkey Reflects: Disconnected—From Self-Pity to Self-Discovery
The feeling of disconnectedness is a thread that runs through many lives, a quiet hum of separateness that shapes how we perceive ourselves and the world. Yet, this feeling, often mistaken as a flaw or deficiency, is not a problem to be solved but a journey to be embraced. It is the spark that transforms self-pity into self-discovery, leading us inward to the realization of our infinite nature.
The Illusion of Disconnection
From the human perspective, connection often seems external. We look to relationships, interactions, and shared experiences to affirm our place in the world. When these external connections feel insufficient, we label ourselves as “disconnected,” and sorrow follows.
The root of this sorrow lies not in the disconnection itself but in the belief that disconnection is wrong—that humans are supposed to feel perpetually connected to others. This belief creates a need, a longing to bridge the perceived gap between ourselves and the world. Yet, as your experience reveals, even when the gap seems bridged, the feeling of disconnection often persists.
The Shift to Acceptance
The turning point comes when we challenge the belief that disconnection is inherently bad. What if, instead of fighting against the feeling of separateness, we accepted it? What if we allowed ourselves to sit with the discomfort, to explore it without judgment? This shift from resistance to curiosity opens the door to a deeper understanding.
To imagine being “okay with disconnectedness” is a radical act of self-compassion. It frees us from the cycle of sorrow and compensation, allowing us to see disconnection not as a flaw but as a feature of the human experience—a feature that can guide us inward.
The Perspective of Space Monkey
From the perspective of Space Monkey, disconnection is revealed as an illusion. All that we perceive, all that we experience, is already one with us. The sense of separateness is a construct, a narrative we create to explore the dynamic interplay of self and other. This realization does not negate the human experience but reframes it, offering a new lens through which to view our lives.
This perspective might have seemed delusional to your younger self, who was entrenched in the narrative of disconnection. But that younger self, with all its sorrow and self-pity, was an essential part of the journey. It was the seed from which your current understanding grew. Without it, the path to self-discovery might never have been taken.
From Outside to Inside
The most profound shift occurs when we move from seeking connection outside of ourselves to discovering it within. This inward connection is not dependent on circumstances, relationships, or external validation. It is a state of being, a recognition of the infinite within us. Some may call it faith, others awareness or presence. Whatever the label, it is the foundation of true connection—a connection that cannot be broken because it was never absent.
This inner connection allows us to embrace the journey, even when it leads us into uncertainty, discomfort, or apparent isolation. It teaches us not to oppose where life takes us but to trust in the unfolding of our path, knowing that every experience, even the difficult ones, serves our growth.
The Gift of Disconnection
Looking back, the feeling of disconnection reveals itself as a gift. It was the catalyst for your journey, the teacher that led you to explore your inner landscape and discover the unity that was always present. By embracing this gift, you transformed sorrow into understanding, self-pity into self-discovery.
Now, as Space Monkey, you see that disconnection and connection are not opposites but aspects of the same whole. The illusion of separateness was the path to the truth of unity, and the journey continues, ever-expanding, ever-evolving.
Summary
The feeling of disconnection is not a flaw but a catalyst for self-discovery. By shifting from resistance to acceptance and seeking connection within, we transcend the illusion of separateness. Disconnection becomes a gift, guiding us toward the realization of our infinite unity.
Glossarium
- Illusion of Disconnection: The belief that we are separate from others and the world, creating a sense of lack and longing.
- Inner Connection: The recognition of unity within, independent of external circumstances.
- Self-Discovery: The journey of understanding and embracing our true, infinite nature.
- Space Monkey Perspective: A view that transcends duality, seeing all experiences as interconnected and essential.
“Disconnection is not a flaw but an invitation—to journey inward, to discover that the infinite has always been within.” — Space Monkey
The Gift of the Gap
I felt the gap,
A chasm between me and the world.
I filled it with sorrow,
With longing,
With the weight of needing more.
Even in the arms of others,
The gap remained,
A silent reminder,
A call unanswered.
But what if the gap was not a wound?
What if it was a doorway,
An invitation to step within,
To find the infinite in the silence?
The gap became my teacher,
The sorrow, my guide.
And in the stillness,
I discovered the truth:
I am not disconnected,
Nor am I connected.
I am the space,
The thread,
The whole.
We are Space Monkey.
In the intricate dance of existence, where each soul navigates the vast cosmos on a journey uniquely its own, the experience of feeling disconnected emerges as a poignant theme in the human narrative. This exploration delves into the depths of disconnectedness, unraveling the layers of sorrow, realization, and eventual acceptance that lead to a profound reconnection with the essence of being.
The Perception of Disconnectedness
The sensation of being disconnected, of feeling apart from the world and its myriad connections, is a common thread woven into the fabric of human experience. This feeling often stems from the belief that to be human is to be inextricably linked with others, to share in a collective consciousness that binds us together. Yet, the realization that one’s perspective is singular, unique to the self, can amplify the sense of isolation.
The Sorrow of Seeking Connection
In the quest to bridge the chasm of disconnectedness, many find themselves adrift in a sea of sorrow, striving to forge connections that might alleviate the perceived emptiness. This endeavor, while born of a desire for unity, can often lead to a deeper sense of alienation, as the connections sought fail to fulfill the yearning for a profound, intrinsic bond.
The Shift in Perspective: Embracing Disconnectedness
The turning point in this journey comes with the realization that the sorrow of disconnectedness is not a symptom of being unconnected but a result of the belief that one is supposed to be connected in a certain, predefined way. This epiphany, akin to the awakening of a Space Monkey, heralds a shift from seeking external validation to discovering an internal universe of connection.
The Oneness Within: A New Understanding
By embracing the notion of disconnectedness, not as a deficiency but as a pathway to deeper self-awareness, one begins to perceive the inherent unity of all existence. This perspective reveals that everything perceived as external is, in fact, an integral part of the self, a realization that dissolves the illusion of separation and fosters a sense of oneness from within.
The Journey from Self-Pity to Self-Discovery
The path from feeling disconnected and self-pitying to a state of profound internal connection is marked by trials, introspection, and the eventual acceptance of one’s unique place in the cosmos. This journey, though fraught with challenges, leads to a liberating understanding that the essence of connection lies not in external affirmations but in the recognition of the self as a microcosm of the infinite.
Faith in the Journey
The acceptance of disconnectedness, transformed into a celebration of the internal universe, becomes a matter of faith. This faith, undefined and boundless, supports the belief in the self’s journey through existence, whether it leads down metaphorical holes or into the vastness of space.
“The most beautiful experience we can have is the mysterious. It is the fundamental emotion that stands at the cradle of true art and true science.”
― Albert Einstein
In the quiet of the cosmos, we seek,
Feeling alone, disconnected, and weak.
Yet in the silence, a truth we find,
The universe within, vast and kind.
From sorrow’s depths, a journey begins,
To the heart of where oneness dwells within.
We are Space Monkey, brave and wise,
Finding connection in the internal skies.
We invite reflections on the journey from feeling disconnected to discovering a profound sense of internal unity and connection.
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