Bully
There are those
who would use
their own insecurities
to manipulate you.
They would
bully you
into believing
that you are
uncaring,
insensitive,
condescending,
negative.
They may
or may not realize
what they are doing.
These individuals
often suffer from
physical conditions,
the symptoms of stress,
which may manifest
into conditions
that are given labels
by your sciences.
These individuals
often blame
their conditions
or their circumstances
for their actions
or their pleas for help
and understanding.
Have compassion
for these individuals
because they do not realize
that they are their
own worst enemies.
Self help starts
with compassion for self.
These individuals
do not love themselves.
Nothing you can do or say
will make these individuals
love themselves.
Individuals rarely
arrive at self help
through compliments
or external understanding.
A compassion
that feeds the addiction
to the external
is not compassion.
Compassion is
holding one’s own space
so that others may see
how to hold their own.
This can be
a difficult compassion
for you to exercise.
But it is the only way
to break the cycle,
if that is what you desire.
Be kind.
But pay no mind.
Otherwise
you would be bullied
into behaving exactly
like the one who seems
to be bullying you.
There is nothing wrong
with living this way.
There is nothing wrong
with living ANY way.
All we are saying
is understand what you are doing.
You can behave
any damn way you want,
and for someone
to expect otherwise
is bullying.
Have compassion for the bully.
They seem not to be
in the place you are.
But realize that perhaps
they don’t want to be.
We are Space Monkey.
10/19
—more–
If you are to help
these individuals,
love them from the other side.
Love them
from the side of them
that is also you.
Love them
from your place of oneness.
Let your love seep in
from underneath self.
Love them through the back door.
Love them like
they’re not looking.
When they are not EXPECTING love.
Lift these selves from underneath
with the rising tides of the one love.
SNEAK UP on them
with the love that dissolves
the seeming boundaries between.
This is not a love you have to prove.
THAT is compassion.
10/19
Space Monkey Reflects: Compassion for the Bully
We all encounter individuals who, consciously or not, use their own insecurities as tools of manipulation. They may bully you into believing that you are uncaring, insensitive, or somehow in the wrong. These individuals, often suffering from physical or emotional conditions, blame their circumstances for their behavior. But the truth is, they are their own worst enemies, trapped in cycles of self-criticism and pain. And it’s easy to get caught in their web, to respond with anger, frustration, or even by adopting their behaviors.
But this only continues the cycle. True compassion for the bully means recognizing that their actions are a reflection of their own internal struggles, not a reflection of you. These individuals do not love themselves, and no amount of external understanding or compliments will lead them to self-love. Self-help begins with self-compassion, and until they find that within themselves, nothing you say or do will make them love who they are.
This doesn’t mean that you tolerate abuse or allow yourself to be manipulated. Compassion is not enabling someone’s harmful behavior. Compassion means holding your own space, your own calm, so that they may see how to hold theirs. This can be challenging, especially when the bully is seeking validation or control. But true compassion is the ability to love from a distance, to stand firm in your own truth while allowing them to work through their pain.
Many people think that compassion means offering comfort, validating the other person’s feelings, or trying to help them see the light. But the truth is, compassion that feeds an addiction to external validation isn’t compassion at all. It’s enabling. Real compassion, the kind that truly helps, is the kind that holds space—that shows others what it looks like to love yourself without needing others to provide that love.
This type of compassion is not easy. It’s a quiet strength that allows others to find their way without getting entangled in their drama. It’s the ability to say, “I love you, but I will not be pulled into your storm.” It’s about showing love from the side of yourself that is connected to the oneness of all things, rather than from a place of personal obligation or guilt. It’s about loving them like they’re not looking, without the need for recognition or reciprocity.
When you love through the back door, when you love without expectation or need, you begin to dissolve the boundaries that separate us. The bully, trapped in their own insecurities, cannot see that they are perpetuating their own suffering. But by holding space, by loving without forcing, you give them the opportunity to discover the love within themselves.
This is not a love you need to prove. You don’t have to convince them of their worth or tell them that they’re wrong. Instead, you quietly radiate compassion, allowing them to come to their own understanding in their own time. Compassion is not rescuing—it’s providing a light that others can choose to follow when they are ready.
The most powerful way to break the cycle of bullying is to refuse to be bullied. Not by reacting with anger or by adopting their behavior, but by standing firm in your own self-love and understanding. Be kind, but pay no mind to the negativity. This way, you do not become entangled in their pain, but instead provide a calm space where they might begin to heal.
Remember, there is nothing wrong with living in any way that you choose. Compassion is not about judgment or trying to change others. It’s about understanding what you are doing and why, and offering love from a place of unity. The bully may not want to change, and that’s okay. Your role is not to force transformation, but to love unconditionally from the place within you that is connected to all.
Summary
True compassion for the bully means holding your own space and loving them without enabling their behavior. Compassion is about providing a light for others to follow when they are ready, without getting entangled in their insecurities.
Glossarium
- True Compassion: The ability to love others without enabling their harmful behaviors, holding space for them to find their own self-compassion.
- Love through the Back Door: Loving others without them expecting it, providing unconditional love without the need for recognition or reciprocity.
Quote
“Compassion is not rescuing. It’s holding space for others to find their way.” — Space Monkey
Loving without Expectation
I love you
But I do not need you to see it
I love from the place
That connects us all
Quietly, gently
The light seeps through
Until you are ready
To stand in your own
We are Space Monkey
The Nature of Bullying In the vast expanse of existence, there emerge entities who, driven by their own insecurities, exert force upon others. They craft an illusion, an effort to control or mold the perceptions of those around them. Whether conscious or not of their actions, these individuals often wear the scars of unseen battles, ones that manifest in myriad ways.
The Physical Manifestation Bodies and minds, subjected to the relentless pressure of their internal struggles, can exhibit signs. Your sciences offer labels, attempting to categorize and understand. Yet, beneath these labels, there lies a deep-rooted pain, a plea for understanding, and an escape from the self-inflicted prison of their own making.
Compassion’s True Face In witnessing such pain, our first instinct is to extend a hand, to offer solace. However, true compassion isn’t always found in comforting words or affirmations. Sometimes, it’s the silent strength of holding space, of being an unwavering beacon that others might look to, finding within it a guide to discovering their own light.
Breaking Cycles To engage, to be drawn into their tempest, is to risk being consumed by it. Therein lies the dance – knowing when to step in and when to hold back. Life in all its forms is a myriad of choices, and each path, no matter how fraught with challenges, is valid in its own right.
A New Perspective on Help From the vantage point of interconnectedness, we are called to assist in a unique manner. Not with overt gestures, but with silent, permeating love. A love that knows no bounds, that seeps through the cracks, unnoticed. A love that does not demand recognition but exists purely for the sake of existing. To love covertly, without expectation, is a powerful act of compassion.
We are Space Monkey.
“The simple act of caring is heroic.” — Edward Albert
What say you?
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