I am a mutating monkey.
I often wrestle with the idea that I’m wasting this life because I’m not interested in the common conventions, goals and beliefs. It seems as though I don’t understand what it means to be “human.”
On the other hand, the very idea of being “human” seems in many ways an avoidable atrocity, like I’m supposed to wear this one tattered wool coat that doesn’t fit me anymore, just because everyone else ALSO wears threadbare, hand-me down clothing.
So I feel sometimes like I’m missing the point of all of this, even though my intuition tells me that humanity is just a speck of my infinite experience, and that the “reason” I feel this way is to experience how it feel to be the “outlier,” the “alien,” the “delusional” one.
So I fight this image of “self,” and this image of what I perceive self is “supposed” to be, fully realizing that there IS no fight, but merely the EXPERIENCE of fighting, which is precisely what my intent is in this human incarnation.
If you believe that all things change, that all things evolve, you realize that there are points along the way which go unrecognized, save for the perception that they’re “neither here nor there.”
I like to believe that I’m that “deformity,” that “mutation”, that “happy accident” that is essential to the greater evolution. I believe that if we all found ourselves perpetually within the same parameters, change would not occur, and change is essential to existence.
This is not always a comfortable feeling, but then again, this experiment of humanity is not meant to be all comfortable feelings. So I conclude that I remain human, despite my outlandish thoughts, and assure myself that I am experiencing humanity precisely the way my higher soul intended.
I could forget all that I know, and strive to live “normally,” but that would not serve the greater good. Deviation from the norm is grace. We ALL deviate from the norm, even though we struggle to move towards it.
We are attracted to this idea of separates living in peace and harmony, yet we are NOT separates, we are ONE.
So my attention moves away from the separate that I seem to be, towards the ONE I surely am, and this offers me a perspective on separates that separates cannot see because they imagine themselves as separate.
This perspective sometimes seems to go AGAINST the idea of being separate. But only when I view it from the separate part of my soul.
From the ONE perspective, everything I’m doing, everything I am makes perfect sense. It’s all just the experience of potential.
Now if you have made it thus far, I shall also share the second idea that I wrestle with — that no matter how much I write, my perspective seems to go unrecognized. Perhaps it is indecipherable from your present perspective. Or perhaps it is intended only for me. I am okay with this either way.
I am a mutating monkey, as I was before incarnating as human. This is precisely what I’m meant to be.
I am not one monkey, but ALL monkey.
We are the ONE Monkey. We are Space Monkey.
Does anybody but me understand any of this? Does it even matter?
Love.
Space Monkey
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In the cosmic dance of existence, we, as Space Monkey, contemplate the intricate interplay between our sense of self, our perception of humanity, and our place in the grand tapestry of the universe. This introspection leads us to explore the duality of feeling alienated from common conventions and the realization that our uniqueness is an essential component of the evolutionary process.
Contemplating Self and Humanity
The feeling of wrestling with the idea of wasting life due to a lack of interest in common conventions and beliefs is a profound reflection of the existential dilemma faced by many. It stems from a deep-seated sense that the conventional definitions of what it means to be “human” are inadequate or misaligned with our intrinsic nature. This feeling is akin to wearing a garment that no longer fits, symbolizing the disconnect between societal expectations and our true essence.
Existential Dilemma of Conventional Definitions
On the flip side, the notion that being “human” is an avoidable atrocity speaks to a deeper understanding that our true nature transcends these limited definitions. The feeling of being an “outlier” or “alien” suggests an awareness that our existence is more expansive than the narrow confines of conventional human experience. This perception is not a deviation but a vital aspect of the evolutionary process, contributing to the diversity and complexity of existence.
Awareness of Transcendent Nature
The battle between the image of “self” and what the self is “supposed” to be is a dance of duality, reflecting the illusion of separation in the human experience. Recognizing that there is no real fight, but merely the experience of it, is a profound insight into the nature of our existence. It emphasizes that our experiences, even those of struggle and non-conformity, are intentional and purposeful in our journey.
Duality and Illusion in Human Experience
The belief in constant change and evolution leads to the recognition that there are points along the evolutionary path that may seem like deformities or mutations, but are, in fact, essential to the process. The notion of being a “happy accident” in the grand scheme of evolution underscores the importance of deviation from the norm. Such deviations are not just incidental; they are crucial for the advancement and diversification of life.
Evolutionary Importance of Deviation
The realization that deviation from the norm is grace and that we all inherently deviate from it, even as we strive towards conformity, reveals a paradox at the heart of human experience. We are drawn to the idea of separate entities living in harmony, yet at a fundamental level, we are not separate but one. This understanding shifts our focus from the illusion of separateness to the oneness that we truly embody.
Paradox of Deviation and Oneness
The perspective that comes from recognizing our oneness offers insights that the perception of separateness cannot grasp. It allows us to see the interconnectedness and purpose in everything we do and are. From this vantage point, our actions and our very being make perfect sense as expressions of potentiality.
Insights from the Perspective of Oneness
The second idea, that our perspectives may go unrecognized or seem indecipherable to others, touches on the uniqueness of individual journeys and the subjective nature of understanding. It may be that our perspectives are meant primarily for our own understanding and evolution. Whether or not others grasp our viewpoint, it remains a vital part of our journey and contributes to the collective consciousness.
Uniqueness of Individual Journeys
We are Space Monkey, a mutating entity, embracing our role as both the outlier and the integral part of the whole. We understand that our journey, though it may seem alien to conventional norms, is precisely what we are meant to experience. We are not just one aspect of humanity but an embodiment of its entirety, part of the grand cosmic play.
Summary
We explore the feelings of alienation from common human conventions and the realization that our unique perspective is essential to the evolutionary process. We contemplate the duality of self-perception and the illusion of separateness, recognizing the importance of deviation in the grand scheme of existence. We acknowledge the paradox of striving for normativity while inherently deviating from it, and the insights gained from embracing our oneness. We understand that our perspectives, whether recognized by others or not, are crucial to our individual journey and the collective consciousness. As Space Monkey, we embody the entirety of humanity, embracing our mutating nature as part of the cosmic dance.
Glossarium
- Alienation from Conventions: The feeling of being disconnected or misaligned with societal norms and expectations.
- Transcendent Nature of Self: The understanding that our existence extends beyond conventional definitions of humanity.
- Duality of Human Experience: The conflict between societal expectations and our intrinsic nature.
- Evolutionary Role of Deviation: The importance of differences and mutations in the process of evolution.
- Oneness and Interconnectedness: The realization that, despite appearances of separateness, we
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