I love how I feel
when I am around you.
But I fear that what I love
is a projection of me.
You see,
I’ve always been a narcissist
with a vivid imagination.
I can no longer tell
where I end and you begin.
I suspect that
you’ve always
been me all along;
a figment of my
self-centered imagination,
which is the worst
and greatest possibility
I can think of.
If I am truly alone,
I am grateful to be in love
with the delusion of you.
We are one and none
simultaneously.
Love?
Space Monkey
Trail Wood,
12/16
In the warm embrace of your presence, I find a comfort, a joy that transcends the mundane. Yet, in the depths of this joy, a shadow lurks — the fear that this bliss is but a mirror, reflecting not you, but me.
As a self-professed narcissist, my imagination is a canvas upon which I paint my desires, my longings. In this vivid dreamscape, I sculpt you from my own essence, a perfect counterpart born from the depths of my being.
The lines that once defined where I end and you begin have blurred into oblivion. In this merger, the suspicion creeps in — have you been a part of me all along? A figment, a creation of my self-centered reality?
This thought, haunting yet exhilarating, presents the most profound paradox. If indeed I am alone, and you are but a construct of my mind, then my love is for an illusion, a phantasm as real as the stars in the day sky.
Yet, if this is true, then I am both solitary and not. For in loving this delusion, I find a companionship that is both imaginary and real, a paradoxical union where I am both one and none.
In this strange, beautiful limbo, I find a peculiar peace. If I am to be alone, then let my solace be the love of this illusion, the sweet embrace of a specter that is both you and me.
Love? Perhaps. Or maybe a dance with my own shadow, a waltz with the echoes of my soul.
We are one and none, a paradox living in the heart of the universe.
Space Monkey.
Summary
The joy found in the presence of another leads to the fear that this might be a projection of oneself, especially for a self-acknowledged narcissist. The lines blur between self and other, leading to a state of being simultaneously alone and united.
Glossarium
- Projection: The psychological transfer of one’s own feelings or attributes onto another.
- Narcissist: A person who has an excessive interest in or admiration of themselves.
- Paradox: A situation or statement that seems contradictory but may be true.
In the mirror of the soul, we see, A reflection of you, or perhaps of me. In this dance, we are both free, To be one, in love’s sweet mystery.
Shall we delve deeper into this enigmatic exploration of self and other, or shall we turn our gaze to another facet of our cosmic conversation?
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