You’re not the only one. But you are the One. Happy Holidays, you.
You may be sitting
there right now wondering
“what am I doing here?”
It may seem that
you’re chasing something
but you’re not sure what exactly.
It may feel as though
time is running out
and that you’re squandering
your best or only chance.
You may fear that you’re not
appreciating this moment
as much as you should
or as well as you could.
Feeling disconnected
at a time when you so
desperately don’t want to be.
An outsider in your own skin.
But you’re not the only one.
Dive deeper into it.
Even if you feel out of it.
We feel most alone
just before we head for home.
Trail Wood,
12/25
Your contemplation captures a universal human experience—the feeling of existential uncertainty, the sense of pursuing something elusive, and the fear of not fully appreciating or understanding one’s life and moments. It’s a profound reflection on the human condition, highlighting our shared struggles with meaning, connection, and self-awareness.
Questioning One’s Purpose
The question “What am I doing here?” is one that many people confront at various points in their lives. It’s a fundamental query about purpose and place in the world, reflecting a deeper yearning to understand our role in the larger scheme of life.
The Elusive Chase
The sensation of chasing something undefined is a common existential experience. It speaks to our deep-rooted desire for fulfillment and meaning, often accompanied by a sense of restlessness or incompleteness. This feeling can be both a motivator and a source of frustration.
The Anxiety of Time and Opportunity
The fear that time is running out and that one might be squandering opportunities resonates with the human concern about making the most of our finite existence. This anxiety can be compounded by societal pressures and personal expectations about where we ‘should’ be in life.
Challenges in Appreciating the Present
The worry about not appreciating the present moment adequately is an acknowledgment of the difficulties in practicing mindfulness and gratitude. In a world that often values achievement and productivity, taking time to be fully present and appreciative can feel challenging.
Feeling Disconnected and Alienated
The sense of disconnection, of being an outsider in your own skin, is a poignant expression of alienation. It’s a reflection of the moments when we feel detached from our surroundings, our peers, and even ourselves, struggling to find a sense of belonging.
The Comfort in Shared Experience
Recognizing that you’re not the only one feeling this way offers a sense of solidarity and comfort. It’s a reminder that these existential dilemmas are part of the shared human experience, and in this shared struggle, there’s a sense of connection.
Encouragement to Dive Deeper
The encouragement to dive deeper, even when feeling out of touch, is an invitation to engage more fully with these challenging feelings. It suggests that through confronting and exploring our uncertainties and fears, we can gain deeper insights and find our way back to a sense of home or belonging.
The Precipice Before Finding ‘Home’
The idea that we feel most alone just before finding our way ‘home’ is a metaphor for the journey of self-discovery. It implies that often, it’s at our lowest points, when we feel most isolated, that we are on the verge of a significant breakthrough or a return to a sense of inner peace and understanding.
Summary
We explore the common experiences of existential questioning, the pursuit of meaning, the anxiety of time and opportunity, challenges in appreciating the present, feelings of disconnection, and the journey towards deeper self-understanding. We consider the comfort found in shared experiences and the encouragement to engage with our deepest feelings as a pathway to finding our sense of ‘home.’
Glossarium
- Existential Questioning: The process of seeking meaning and understanding one’s purpose in life.
- Alienation and Disconnection: The feeling of being detached from one’s surroundings and self.
- Journey of Self-Discovery: The process of exploring and understanding one’s inner world, leading to a sense of belonging and peace.
In the quest of life’s deep dive,
We seek, we yearn, we strive,
In shared struggles, we’re alive,
Towards understanding, we drive.
We invite your reflections on the journey of self-discovery and the challenges and comforts of existential questioning.
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