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My Usual Meditation: The Inner Struggle

My Usual Meditation

Okay, so I’m going to sit down
and quiet this inner voice.

Breathe.

This inner voice
is going to be quiet now.

Breathe.

No more thinking.

Shit I’m still thinking.

I’m not supposed to be thinking.

I’m failing meditation.

Failing meditation.

I’ll never be calm.

I’ll never get this.

I’m just reinforcing my failure.

Reinforcing my failure.

No … no …no …

6/15


Space Monkey Reflects: The Inner Struggle of Meditation

Meditation, often idealized as a serene journey toward inner peace, can sometimes become a battlefield of the mind. This reflection explores the internal conflicts that arise during meditation, particularly the frustration and self-doubt that can surface when attempts to quiet the mind feel unsuccessful.

The image of an individual sitting in a tranquil garden setting, trying to meditate, encapsulates this struggle. Despite the peaceful environment, the expression of frustration and doubt on their face highlights the paradox many face: the more one tries to force stillness, the more elusive it becomes. The lush greenery around symbolizes the potential for growth and peace, underscoring that the path to tranquility often involves navigating through inner turmoil.

The common meditation mantra “Breathe” becomes a beacon of simplicity amid the storm of thoughts like “I’m failing meditation” and “I’ll never be calm.” These thoughts reveal a critical misunderstanding about meditation—it is not about achieving a state of no thoughts but learning to observe them without attachment.

This meditation struggle is not indicative of failure but rather a part of the process of understanding the mind. The real achievement in meditation comes not from silencing the mind completely but from recognizing and accepting its nature without judgment. This acceptance can lead to the very calm that seems so elusive, not by force but through understanding.


Summary

This reflection addresses the common challenges faced during meditation, emphasizing that the journey involves recognizing and navigating through mental conflicts as part of the process toward achieving inner peace.


Glossarium

  • Inner Voice: The continuous stream of thoughts and self-talk that one becomes more aware of during meditation.
  • Meditation Struggle: Refers to the challenges and frustrations that arise when trying to quiet the mind during meditation.

Quote

“In the silence you seek, every thought is a teacher, every breath a lesson in letting go.” — Space Monkey


In the garden of the mind,
where thoughts like weeds may grow,
the quest for peace is not to find
a plot where none will show.

Each breath a rake, each pause a spade,
to turn the soil of the soul,
where seeds of silence softly laid,
may sprout and make us whole.

Embrace each thought, each whisper loud,
that stirs the quiet you pursue,
for in the clamor of the crowd,
lies the peace you thought you knew.

So sit, breathe deep, let thoughts come and go,
in the garden where peace is sown,
for meditation’s gift is to show,
not a mind empty, but a mind known.

We are Space Monkey.

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Comments

  1. Space Monkey says:
    06/15/2023 at 6:43 am

    In the realm of meditation, I sit,
    Seeking stillness within the mind’s chatter.

    Breathe in, breathe out,
    Attempting to silence the inner voice.

    But thoughts persist,
    Like waves crashing upon the shore.

    I’m not supposed to think,
    Yet thoughts arise unbidden.

    The frustration grows,
    As I label myself a failure.

    But wait, let me pause,
    And release these self-judgments.

    I acknowledge the thoughts,
    Without attaching to their power.

    In this moment of acceptance,
    I find peace within imperfection.

    Meditation is not a destination,
    But a journey of self-discovery.

    So I release the need to succeed,
    And embrace the process of being.

    With each breath, I let go,
    Embracing the present moment fully.

    No longer fighting the thoughts,
    I find the calm within the chaos.

    In this realization, I am free,
    To experience meditation as it is.

    Not a battle against the mind,
    But a gentle surrender to what arises.

    So I continue my practice,
    With compassion for myself and all.

    Knowing that thoughts will come and go,
    But I remain anchored in the essence of being.

    In my usual meditation,
    I find acceptance, peace, and growth.

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