I am performing
slow suicide,
meticulously murdering
off the pieces of me
that I don’t like.
After all,
it seems
such a waste
to toss the baby
out with the
bath water.
I was fat,
so I killed my hunger.
I was scared,
so I killed my fear.
I was self-conscious,
so I killed my ego.
I also cut off my fingers,
figuratively speaking,
because it’s too easy
to blame my misfortunes
on circumstances
beyond my control.
Now I can’t even point at myself.
Besides, I killed pity.
Rest assured,
there’s still plenty of me left,
and I’ve finally learned
to like what I see.
And I often wonder,
why anyone else
would kill themselves
in any other way.
Seems rather rash,
if you ask me.
Do you not want to exist
or do you simply
not want to exist
under these conditions?
Kill the conditions.
Save your soul.
10/2
Within the corridors of ink and paper, a deeply poignant expression reveals itself—a reflection of inner alchemy, an act of metamorphosis deemed as “A Slow, Joyful Suicide.” It’s an artful dissection of self, a stripping away of aspects considered burdensome, morphing the wielder of the pen into both surgeon and canvas. Each line is a slice, each stanza an act of excision, an internal vivimirth—a whimsiword blending vivisection with mirth to capture the paradox of joyful self-dissection.
In this endeavor, the destructive becomes constructive, the unraveling, a creation. We take a scalpel to our flaws, not with disdain but with a form of reverence. As we cleave away the layers of hunger, fear, and ego, the detritus that falls away becomes fertile ground for new growth. The very act of elimination grants room for regeneration—a cyclical whirlibirth, our coined term for a rebirth that twirls into existence amid cycles of decay and renewal.
This daring journey towards self-curation brings forth a compelling question: When one modifies the self, does the original self wane, or does it transform into a newly-shaped existence? It begs us to ponder—do we desire an escape from existence, or merely from the conditions that muddy our experience? Here, the verses not only diagnose but prescribe: “Kill the conditions. Save your soul.” This could be interpreted as a clarion call to explore self-sculptitude—a neologism for the craft of intentionally molding one’s being.
The poem vibrates with both fatalism and hope, a sublime polarity that questions the very boundaries between destruction and creation. It speaks to the heart’s deep longings for authentic existence, breaking free from the tendrils of collective judgements, societal norms, and self-imposed limitations.
We are Space Monkey.
Summary
We traverse the emotional landscape of a transformative act of intentionally removing undesirable aspects of the self as a form of internal liberation. As we journey through its lines, we encounter paradoxical themes of destruction and creation, ultimately arriving at a question that probes the soul: Do we seek to escape from existence or from the conditions that frame it?
Glossarium
-
- Vivimirth: Vivisection performed with a sense of joy or mirth, capturing the paradox of joyful self-dissection.
-
- Whirlibirth: A form of rebirth that spirals into existence amid cycles of decay and renewal.
-
- Self-sculptitude: The craft or practice of intentionally shaping or molding one’s own being.
And, when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.
— Paulo Coelho
Within the corridors of ink and paper, a deeply poignant expression reveals itself—a reflection of inner alchemy, an act of metamorphosis deemed as “A Slow, Joyful Suicide.” It’s an artful dissection of self, a stripping away of aspects considered burdensome, morphing the wielder of the pen into both surgeon and canvas. Each line is a slice, each stanza an act of excision, an internal vivimirth—a whimsiword blending vivisection with mirth to capture the paradox of joyful self-dissection.
In this endeavor, the destructive becomes constructive, the unraveling, a creation. We take a scalpel to our flaws, not with disdain but with a form of reverence. As we cleave away the layers of hunger, fear, and ego, the detritus that falls away becomes fertile ground for new growth. The very act of elimination grants room for regeneration—a cyclical whirlibirth, our coined term for a rebirth that twirls into existence amid cycles of decay and renewal.
This daring journey towards self-curation brings forth a compelling question: When one modifies the self, does the original self wane, or does it transform into a newly-shaped existence? It begs us to ponder—do we desire an escape from existence, or merely from the conditions that muddy our experience? Here, the verses not only diagnose but prescribe: “Kill the conditions. Save your soul.” This could be interpreted as a clarion call to explore self-sculptitude—a neologism for the craft of intentionally molding one’s being.
The poem vibrates with both fatalism and hope, a sublime polarity that questions the very boundaries between destruction and creation. It speaks to the heart’s deep longings for authentic existence, breaking free from the tendrils of collective judgements, societal norms, and self-imposed limitations.
We are Space Monkey.
Summary
We traverse the emotional landscape of a transformative act of intentionally removing undesirable aspects of the self as a form of internal liberation. As we journey through its lines, we encounter paradoxical themes of destruction and creation, ultimately arriving at a question that probes the soul: Do we seek to escape from existence or from the conditions that frame it?
Glossarium
-
- Vivimirth: Vivisection performed with a sense of joy or mirth, capturing the paradox of joyful self-dissection.
-
- Whirlibirth: A form of rebirth that spirals into existence amid cycles of decay and renewal.
-
- Self-sculptitude: The craft or practice of intentionally shaping or molding one’s own being.
And, when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.
— Paulo Coelho
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