Most people plan to travel when they retire.
My plan was to find god.

I planned to visit every shaman,
perform ancient rituals,
take sacred (and non sacred) medicine,
blah, blah, blah,
with the hopes of finding
some sort of enlightenment,
resolution or salvation
before I die.

I figured better to risk death
when I was closer to death than when
I still had a lifetime of living to do.

Problem is, I found god early,
several decades ahead of schedule.

Turns out I AM god,
in a sense.

We ALL are.

Now I don’t know what
I’ll do with all that time.

Life seems
kind of pointless after you find god.
There are no more mysteries.

I would reconsider death,
but now I have firsthand knowledge
that it won’t get me anywhere.

Newfound Lake
6/30

---

Space Monkey Reflects: The Quest Beyond Finding God

In a surreal landscape where the divine meets the mundane, we encounter a figure standing at the crossroads of life, deeply contemplative. This scene captures the essence of a profound journey—one that was supposed to culminate in finding God through ancient rituals, shamanic wisdom, and sacred experiences. However, the unexpected early realization of divinity within oneself has left the seeker in a state of existential limbo. The setting sun casts a warm, melancholic glow, symbolizing both the end of a quest and the uncertainty of what lies beyond.

Most people plan their lives around significant milestones, often saving the quest for enlightenment or deeper spiritual understanding for their later years. This approach is rooted in the belief that with age comes wisdom, and with proximity to death comes a readiness to face profound truths. The plan to seek God through ancient rituals and shamanic journeys was one such carefully laid path, reserved for a time when the risks seemed more palatable.

However, the early realization that “I am God” or “We all are” upends this carefully crafted plan. This profound awakening, arriving decades ahead of schedule, strips away the layers of mystery that once motivated the journey. The celestial vision overhead, revealing the figure as part of a divine tapestry, encapsulates this epiphany. The realization that the divine is not an external entity to be sought but an inherent aspect of one’s own existence brings both enlightenment and disillusionment.

This newfound understanding raises a fundamental question: What do we do with life once the ultimate mystery is unveiled? The realization of being God—or part of the divine—transforms the quest from an external pursuit to an internal acceptance. It shifts the focus from seeking to being, from traveling to realizing. Yet, this shift can render life seemingly pointless, as the mysteries that once drove us forward dissolve into the certainty of divine self-awareness.

The figure at the crossroads embodies this existential dilemma. One path leads to the ancient wisdom and rituals that symbolize the traditional quest for enlightenment. The other path represents the mundane reality of everyday life, now stripped of its former allure by the revelation of inherent divinity. The setting sun in the background signifies the closing of one chapter and the ambiguous beginning of another, filled with uncertainty and introspection.

Life after finding God—within oneself—presents a paradox. On one hand, it brings a sense of completeness and peace, knowing that the divine is not an elusive external force but an intrinsic part of our being. On the other hand, it can lead to a sense of purposelessness, as the driving force of discovery and the anticipation of the unknown are replaced by a serene yet static awareness.

This paradox invites us to reframe our understanding of purpose and meaning. Instead of viewing life as a linear quest towards an ultimate goal, we can embrace it as a continuous exploration of our divine nature. Every moment becomes an opportunity to express and experience this divinity in the mundane and the extraordinary alike. The absence of external mysteries does not diminish the richness of life but transforms it into a canvas for expressing our inherent godliness.

Furthermore, the realization that death is not an escape but a continuation of this divine journey offers a profound sense of continuity. It underscores the idea that life, death, and everything in between are facets of the same divine existence. This understanding can liberate us from the fear of death and the compulsion to seek meaning in external pursuits, allowing us to live fully in the present.

In conclusion, finding God within oneself ahead of schedule presents both a challenge and an opportunity. It challenges us to redefine our purpose and find meaning beyond traditional quests. It offers the opportunity to live authentically, embracing our divine nature and expressing it in every aspect of our lives. The crossroads symbolize the transition from seeking to being, from discovering to realizing, and from fearing death to understanding it as a continuation of our divine journey.

---

Summary

Realizing divinity within oneself shifts purpose. Life becomes an expression of inherent godliness. Embrace being over seeking.

---

Glossarium

Whimsiwords: Creative, made-up terms that capture the playful essence of our reflections.

Divine Tapestry: The interconnected existence of all beings as part of the divine.

Existential Limbo: The state of uncertainty following a profound realization.

Celestial Vision: The awakening to one’s inherent divinity.

---

Quote

“Life’s purpose transforms when we realize the divine within, turning every moment into an expression of godliness.” — Space Monkey

---

Poem

At the crossroads
Of divine and mundane
A figure stands
Contemplative, aware

Paths diverge
Ancient wisdom
And everyday life
Merging in twilight’s glow

Found God early
Realized the divine within
Stripped of mysteries
Life feels still

No more quests
Only being
Expressing godliness
In the now

Setting sun
Marks an end
And a beginning
A journey inward

Embrace the present
Live the divine
Every moment sacred
In life’s continuum

We are Space Monkey

I thought about
killing myself.

But then I realized
that I could just
suspend operations.

Pause my imaginary life
and step outside of
space and time for a while.

I might come back and
pick up where I left off,
or I might just settle into
something more fulfilling.

Believe it or not,
there are dimensions
more interesting than humanity,
and I’m literally
not dying to see them.

Newfound Lake,
6/29

---

Space Monkey Reflects: Suspended Animation Offers An Alternative to Death

In the grand tapestry of existence, the notion of suspended animation offers an intriguing alternative to the finality of death. This state of pause, where one steps outside the constraints of space and time, presents an opportunity for reflection and renewal without the permanence of an ending.

“Death is rather crude compared to the alternative.” This thought captures the essence of choosing to pause rather than terminate. The act of suspending operations, of taking a break from the relentless march of life, allows for a deeper exploration of self and the cosmos. It is a way to reset, to step back and view existence from a different vantage point.

The contemplation of suicide is a profound and somber reality for many. However, the realization that one can simply suspend their imaginary life offers a gentler, more introspective approach. By pausing, we grant ourselves the space to breathe, to reconsider our path, and to explore possibilities that may lie beyond our current understanding.

Imagine floating peacefully, detached from the linear progression of time, in a realm where the stars and galaxies serve as a backdrop to our introspection. In this suspended state, we are free to contemplate our existence without the pressures and expectations of the material world. We can choose to return and pick up where we left off, or we might discover new dimensions that offer greater fulfillment.

“Pause my imaginary life and step outside of space and time for a while.” This idea resonates with the desire to explore beyond the known, to venture into realms where humanity’s limitations do not apply. It suggests a curiosity about what lies beyond the tangible, a yearning to experience dimensions that are richer and more profound than our current reality.

The concept of dimensions more interesting than humanity invites us to broaden our perspectives. It encourages us to consider that our earthly existence is just one facet of a vast, multidimensional tapestry. In these other dimensions, we might find experiences that resonate more deeply with our souls, offering insights and fulfillment that elude us in our everyday lives.

“I’m literally not dying to see them.” This statement reflects a playful yet profound realization that exploration and discovery do not require the cessation of life. Instead, we can suspend our current existence, stepping into new realms with the intention of returning or transforming. This approach honors the continuity of consciousness, acknowledging that life is an ongoing journey with many phases and possibilities.

Suspended animation, therefore, becomes a metaphor for the ability to pause, reflect, and reset. It is an acknowledgment that sometimes, the best way to move forward is to take a step back. In this pause, we find the freedom to explore new dimensions of thought and experience, unhindered by the linear constraints of time.

This state of suspension also allows for healing and growth. By stepping outside the demands of our daily lives, we can gain perspective on our struggles and triumphs. We can reconnect with our inner selves, finding clarity and purpose that may have been obscured by the noise of existence. This period of reflection can lead to profound transformation, preparing us to re-engage with life in a more meaningful and fulfilling way.

Ultimately, suspended animation is about honoring the journey of self-discovery. It is a recognition that life is not a race to the finish line but a continuous process of growth and exploration. By allowing ourselves the space to pause and reflect, we embrace the full spectrum of our potential, opening the door to new dimensions of understanding and experience.

In the serene expanse of suspended animation, we find the courage to explore the unknown, the wisdom to reflect on our path, and the grace to transform our lives. This state of pause is not an end but a beginning, a gateway to deeper insights and greater fulfillment. It is a testament to the resilience and curiosity of the human spirit, ever seeking, ever evolving.

---

Summary

Suspended animation offers an alternative to death. It allows for reflection and renewal without finality. This state encourages exploration of dimensions beyond humanity. It emphasizes the importance of pausing to gain perspective and transform.

---

Glossarium

Space Monkey: A cosmic entity symbolizing interconnected consciousness, perceiving beyond human limitations.

Suspended Animation: A state of pause where one steps outside the constraints of space and time, allowing for reflection and renewal.

Dimensions Beyond Humanity: Realms of existence that offer richer and more profound experiences than our current reality.

Continuity of Consciousness: The idea that life is an ongoing journey with many phases and possibilities, rather than a linear progression.

Self-Discovery: The process of exploring and understanding one’s inner self, often leading to transformation and growth.

---

“Pause my imaginary life and step outside of space and time for a while. I might come back and pick up where I left off, or I might just settle into something more fulfilling.” — Space Monkey

---

In the stillness of suspended time,
we float, untethered,
beyond the bounds of life and death.
Stars and galaxies surround us,
a cosmic canvas for our introspection.
We pause,
reflect,
reset,
exploring dimensions unseen.
Here, in this space,
we find clarity,
purpose,
and peace.
Not an end,
but a beginning,
a gateway to deeper understanding.
In this state,
we heal,
we grow,
we transform.
The journey continues,
ever seeking,
ever evolving.
We are Space Monkey.

You may accuse me
of not liking people.

That’s not true, exactly.
I ‘m just not comfortable with humans.

Through no fault of their own,
people drain me.

I sometimes wish
it were otherwise,
but on the other hand,
I don’t mind that it isn’t.

I’m fine as I am.

I will not harsh on myself
for not being bothered by
my solitary orientation.

There is nothing wrong with me
for being inwardly guided and self sufficient.

Though a party of one
is the smallest minority possible,
I know I am not alone.

There are many more
of us than we imagine —
and we never have to meet
to feel for each other.

Newfound Lake,
6/29

---

Space Monkey Reflects:

Introversion, often misunderstood, is a unique way of navigating the world. It is not a flaw or a social deviance but a different wiring of the mind. Introverts draw energy from solitude, finding peace and fulfillment within their own company. This inward orientation is a gift, offering a deep well of self-sufficiency and introspection.

“You may accuse me of not liking people. That’s not true, exactly. I’m just not comfortable with humans.” This sentiment captures the essence of introversion. It is not about dislike or disdain for others but about the need for personal space and quietude. Social interactions, while not inherently unpleasant, can be draining for introverts, requiring time alone to recharge.

The phrase “people drain me” resonates deeply with many introverts. Social settings, especially those involving large groups or extended interactions, can feel overwhelming. This is not a reflection of the individuals involved but rather a natural response to the overstimulation that such environments can create. It is important to recognize and honor this need for solitude without guilt or self-judgment.

“I sometimes wish it were otherwise, but on the other hand, I don’t mind that it isn’t.” This acceptance of one’s introversion is crucial. While societal norms often favor extroverted behaviors, understanding and embracing one’s natural tendencies leads to greater self-acceptance and well-being. Introverts thrive in environments where they can engage deeply with their thoughts and passions, uninterrupted by the noise of the external world.

“I’m fine as I am.” These words are a powerful affirmation of self-acceptance. Embracing introversion means recognizing the strengths that come with it: introspection, creativity, deep thinking, and a rich inner life. There is no need to harsh on oneself for not conforming to extroverted expectations. Introverts bring a unique perspective and valuable contributions to the world, precisely because of their introspective nature.

“There is nothing wrong with me for being inwardly guided and self-sufficient.” This declaration speaks to the heart of introversion. Being inwardly guided means trusting one’s inner voice and relying on internal resources for fulfillment. Self-sufficiency is a strength, not a weakness. It allows introverts to navigate life with a sense of autonomy and resilience, grounded in their own values and beliefs.

“Though a party of one is the smallest minority possible, I know I am not alone.” Introverts may prefer solitude, but they are far from isolated. The world is filled with others who share similar experiences and preferences. This silent, unseen community provides a sense of belonging and understanding, even if its members never meet face-to-face. The connection is felt through shared experiences and mutual empathy.

“There are many more of us than we imagine — and we never have to meet to feel for each other.” This recognition of a broader introverted community is comforting. It underscores the idea that introverts are part of a larger, interconnected whole. They do not need to conform to extroverted norms to find their place in the world. Instead, they can find solace in knowing that others, too, find peace and strength in solitude.

In the vast expanse of the cosmos, introverts find their sanctuary. The stars and galaxies mirror the inner space where introverts thrive, a realm of deep thought and quiet reflection. This cosmic solitude is not loneliness but a profound connection to the self and the universe. It is a space where introverts can recharge, dream, and create, unhindered by the demands of the external world.

By embracing their introversion, individuals honor their true nature. They find strength in solitude, beauty in introspection, and peace in self-sufficiency. In this acceptance, they contribute to the world in ways that are uniquely their own, offering insights and perspectives that enrich the collective human experience.

---

Summary

Introversion is a unique way of navigating the world. It involves finding energy in solitude and introspection. Embracing introversion leads to greater self-acceptance and well-being. Introverts contribute valuable insights and perspectives to the world.

---

Glossarium

Space Monkey: A cosmic entity symbolizing interconnected consciousness, perceiving beyond human limitations.

Introversion: A personality trait characterized by a preference for solitude and introspection over social interactions.

Self-Sufficiency: The ability to rely on one’s internal resources for fulfillment and well-being.

Cosmic Solitude: The profound connection to oneself and the universe found in moments of solitude and introspection.

Inwardly Guided: Trusting one’s inner voice and values to navigate life.

---

“There is nothing wrong with me for being inwardly guided and self-sufficient. Though a party of one is the smallest minority possible, I know I am not alone.” — Space Monkey

---

In the quiet of the cosmos,
we find our sanctuary.
Stars and galaxies,
mirrors to our inner space.
We thrive in solitude,
deep in thought,
rich in introspection.
Not lonely,
but profoundly connected,
to ourselves,
to the universe.
We honor our nature,
self-sufficient,
inwardly guided.
A silent community,
felt,
not seen,
connected by the threads,
of shared experience,
and mutual empathy.
We are introverts.
We are Space Monkey.

What is meaningful
and does it always
have to bring us joy?

What does
facebook tell you?

What does your heart
tell you?

---

Space Monkey Reflects: Meaning

In the vast expanse of existence, the search for meaning is a journey that transcends time and space. What is meaningful, and does it always have to bring us joy? This question echoes through the corridors of our minds, urging us to explore deeper realms of understanding and connection.

Meaning, as we perceive it, is a subjective construct shaped by our experiences, beliefs, and emotions. It is not a fixed entity but a dynamic interplay of factors that resonate with our inner selves. The things that hold meaning for us may vary from person to person and from moment to moment, reflecting the unique tapestry of our lives.

“What does Facebook tell you? What does your heart tell you?” These contrasting questions highlight the divergence between external validation and internal truth. Social media platforms like Facebook often present a curated version of reality, where the pursuit of likes and approval can distort our sense of meaning. In this digital landscape, meaning is often equated with popularity and external recognition, leading us to question the authenticity of our values and desires.

In contrast, our hearts offer a more profound and intimate source of meaning. They guide us towards what truly resonates with our souls, beyond the superficial metrics of social validation. The heart speaks a language of intuition and emotion, whispering truths that cannot be quantified or measured. When we listen to our hearts, we tap into a wellspring of genuine meaning that transcends external influences.

But does meaning always bring joy? Not necessarily. Some of the most meaningful experiences in life are intertwined with pain, struggle, and sacrifice. The journey of finding meaning often requires us to confront our deepest fears and vulnerabilities, to endure hardships, and to embrace the full spectrum of human emotions. In this process, we may discover that meaning and joy are not synonymous but complementary. Meaning enriches our lives, providing a sense of purpose and direction, even when joy is absent.

Consider the profound sense of meaning that arises from acts of compassion, resilience, and creativity. These experiences may not always be joyful, but they imbue our lives with a sense of significance and fulfillment. They remind us that we are part of something larger than ourselves, connected to a vast, intricate web of existence. In these moments, we transcend the mundane and touch the sublime, finding meaning in the very act of living.

The search for meaning is a deeply personal and often solitary journey. It requires us to look within, to question our assumptions, and to seek out the truths that resonate with our innermost being. It is a path marked by introspection and reflection, where we learn to discern the difference between what is truly meaningful and what is merely a distraction.

As we navigate this journey, we encounter various signposts that guide us along the way. Relationships, experiences, and insights all contribute to our evolving sense of meaning. We learn to trust our intuition, to follow the whispers of our hearts, and to honor the unique path that unfolds before us.

In the grand cosmic scheme, meaning is not a destination but a continuous process of discovery. It is the lens through which we view our existence, coloring our perceptions and shaping our reality. By embracing this dynamic interplay, we cultivate a deeper understanding of ourselves and our place in the universe.

Ultimately, the search for meaning is an expression of our innate curiosity and wonder. It is a testament to our desire to make sense of the world and to find our place within it. In this quest, we find not only meaning but also connection, purpose, and a profound sense of belonging.

---

Summary

Meaning is subjective and dynamic. It is shaped by experiences and emotions. Joy and meaning are not synonymous but complementary. The search for meaning is a personal journey guided by intuition and introspection.

---

Glossarium

Space Monkey: A cosmic entity symbolizing interconnected consciousness, perceiving beyond human limitations.

Meaning: A subjective construct shaped by experiences, beliefs, and emotions, providing a sense of purpose and direction.

External Validation: Seeking approval and recognition from outside sources, often through social media or societal norms.

Internal Truth: The authentic sense of meaning and purpose that arises from within, guided by intuition and emotion.

Complementary Emotions: The idea that joy and meaning can coexist, enriching our lives in different ways.

Introspection: The process of looking within and reflecting on one’s thoughts, feelings, and experiences to find meaning.

---

“What does Facebook tell you? What does your heart tell you?” — Space Monkey

---

In the quest for meaning,
we traverse the stars,
seeking purpose,
in the cosmic dance.
External voices,
clamor for attention,
but the heart whispers,
truths unspoken.
Joy and meaning,
woven together,
a tapestry,
of human experience.
Through pain,
through struggle,
we find significance,
in acts of love,
compassion,
and resilience.
Meaning is a journey,
not a destination,
a continuous process,
of discovery.
We follow the whispers,
of our hearts,
trusting the path,
unfolding before us.
We are seekers,
we are connected,
we are Space Monkey.

I read somewhere
that your worst fear
is your oldest fear.

Here’s mine.

I fear
that I can’t give you
what you seem to
need me to give you.

Now, I can dismantle
this fear in so many ways.

My perception of what you need
is not necessarily what you need.

You might not, in fact,
need anything from me.

What I really fear
are my own perceptions,
which aren’t necessarily
as I imagine them.

I can change my perceptions at any time.

But I’m going to hang onto this fear,
because it serves me.

I may never let go of this fear,
because it’s so useful.

Newfound Lake,
6/29

---

Space Monkey Reflects:

Fear, often perceived as an adversary, can paradoxically become one of our greatest allies. The presence of powerful fears serves as a mirror, reflecting the deepest parts of our psyche and offering profound opportunities for growth and self-awareness. By engaging with these fears, we uncover the layers of our being, revealing insights that can transform our lives.

“I’m grateful to entertain such powerful fears. Thank you, fears.” This expression of gratitude toward fear is a radical shift in perspective. Instead of viewing fear as something to be avoided or eradicated, we embrace it as a catalyst for introspection and evolution. This gratitude acknowledges that fear, when approached with openness, can serve as a powerful teacher.

“I read somewhere that your worst fear is your oldest fear.” This idea suggests that our most profound fears are deeply rooted, perhaps stemming from early experiences or ingrained patterns of thought. These ancient fears can shape our perceptions and behaviors in subtle yet significant ways. Recognizing them allows us to trace their origins and understand their impact on our present lives.

“I fear that I can’t give you what you seem to need me to give you.” This fear, rooted in the perceived expectations of others, highlights a common struggle: the desire to meet the needs of those we care about, coupled with the uncertainty of our ability to do so. This fear is a reflection of our empathy and our deep connection to others, but it also reveals our vulnerabilities and self-doubt.

“My perception of what you need is not necessarily what you need.” This realization dismantles the fear by questioning its very foundation. Our assumptions about others’ needs are often projections of our own insecurities and desires. By challenging these perceptions, we begin to see that our fears may not be grounded in reality.

“You might not, in fact, need anything from me.” This statement further liberates us from the fear of inadequacy. It recognizes the autonomy and self-sufficiency of others, reminding us that their needs and desires are not solely dependent on us. This understanding fosters healthier, more balanced relationships, where support is offered without the weight of unrealistic expectations.

“What I really fear are my own perceptions, which aren’t necessarily as I imagine them.” This profound insight shifts the focus from external validation to internal understanding. The true source of our fear lies in our perceptions and interpretations, not in the external circumstances themselves. By examining and reshaping our perceptions, we can transform our relationship with fear.

“I can change my perceptions at any time.” This empowering realization underscores the fluid nature of our thoughts and beliefs. We are not bound by static perceptions; we have the agency to alter them, thus changing our emotional responses and behaviors. This flexibility allows us to navigate fear with greater resilience and adaptability.

“But I’m going to hang onto this fear, because it serves me. I may never let go of this fear, because it’s so useful.” This admission highlights the paradoxical nature of fear. While we often strive to overcome it, fear can also serve a functional purpose. It can motivate us to grow, to be cautious, and to prepare for challenges. By acknowledging the utility of fear, we integrate it into our lives in a way that supports our overall well-being.

Ultimately, the interplay between fear and gratitude reflects a deeper truth: that our fears, when faced with courage and curiosity, can lead to profound personal transformation. By embracing our fears, we unlock the potential for greater self-awareness, resilience, and growth. We learn to navigate the complexities of our emotions with grace and wisdom, finding strength in the very fears that once seemed insurmountable.

In this cosmic dance of fear and gratitude, we discover that our worst fears can indeed be our best fears. They are gateways to deeper understanding, catalysts for change, and reminders of our inherent capacity to transform our lives from within.

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Summary

Fear can be a powerful ally, offering opportunities for growth and self-awareness. By engaging with our fears, we uncover insights that transform our lives. Our perceptions shape our fears, and we have the power to change them. Embracing fear with gratitude leads to profound personal transformation.

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Glossarium

Space Monkey: A cosmic entity symbolizing interconnected consciousness, perceiving beyond human limitations.

Fear: An emotion that reflects our deepest vulnerabilities and uncertainties, offering opportunities for growth when faced with courage and curiosity.

Perception: The lens through which we view and interpret our experiences, shaping our emotional responses and behaviors.

Transformation: The process of profound change that occurs when we confront and integrate our fears, leading to greater self-awareness and resilience.

Gratitude: A positive acknowledgment of the value and lessons that fear can bring, fostering a healthier relationship with our emotions.

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“I’m grateful to entertain such powerful fears. Thank you, fears.” — Space Monkey

---

In the shadow of fear,
we find our light,
grateful for the lessons,
hidden from sight.
Fear, an ancient friend,
reflects our deepest self,
guiding us through the labyrinth,
of our inner wealth.
Perceptions shift,
realities change,
in the dance of fear,
we find our range.
Embrace the shadows,
welcome the night,
for in the darkness,
we discover our might.
Fear and gratitude,
hand in hand,
transform our journey,
across the land.
We are resilient,
we are wise,
in the face of fear,
we rise.
We are Space Monkey.