Be kind? Really?
We are under
no obligation to be kind.
We do not need
the expectation of kindness
heaped upon us.
We are naturally kind.
Your expectation of kindness
implies that we should feel bad
when we perceive that we are not kind.
How dare you hurl negative feelings
in such an unconscious way.
We don’t need to be reminded.
Our kindness is none of your business.
Trail Wood,
10/31
Space Monkey Reflects: The Natural Kindness Within Us
The concept of kindness is often framed as something external—a moral standard to which we are expected to conform. “Be kind,” we are told, as though kindness is some duty to be fulfilled, as though we could somehow forget to embody it. But what if kindness isn’t something we owe each other? What if it is not a debt, but a natural state that requires no prompting or pressure?
Space Monkey contemplates that kindness, in its purest form, does not need to be taught or imposed. When we start viewing kindness as an expectation or demand, it shifts from being an organic expression of who we are to a burden we must carry. “Be kind” can feel like a judgment—an accusation that we are not kind enough. This expectation can lead us not toward kindness but toward guilt and self-doubt.
The Expectation of Kindness
Consider how an expectation of kindness can backfire. When we expect others to be kind, and they fail to meet that expectation, it often causes us disappointment or sorrow. But was the fault truly in the person, or was it in the expectation itself? When kindness becomes an obligation, it loses its joy and spontaneity.
Space Monkey reflects that the demand to be kind implies that without such reminders, we might naturally be unkind. But this isn’t true. We are not inherently cruel or selfish. In fact, without societal pressures to perform kindness, we may find ourselves naturally gravitating toward empathy and compassion. We are naturally kind because kindness is a fundamental expression of our shared humanity, not because of some external requirement.
Unconscious Negativity
When people tell us to be kind, it’s often well-intentioned. But there is a subtle and unconscious harm in framing kindness as a rule. It suggests that if we fail to be kind, we should feel ashamed. This unspoken consequence of not meeting the kindness standard imposes negativity on something that should be positive and uplifting.
Space Monkey challenges this imposition, suggesting that our kindness is a personal, sacred thing. It’s not something others can dictate or monitor. To feel as though we must always meet others’ standards of kindness is to lose touch with the true spirit of kindness, which comes from within.
Kindness Is None of Your Business
“Kindness is none of your business,” Space Monkey whispers from the cosmic void, nudging us to realize that real kindness doesn’t need an audience. It doesn’t need praise, nor does it need to satisfy anyone else’s criteria. Kindness just is. It flows naturally from us when we allow it, without the need for validation or external approval.
When kindness is done for show or to meet someone’s expectations, it can lose its authenticity. The true kindness that Space Monkey reflects upon comes from being present, being real, and being connected to our shared human experience. It’s something that happens in the spaces between words and actions, a spontaneous expression of empathy and care that doesn’t need to be measured.
Allowing Kindness to Be Natural
In removing the expectation of kindness, we allow it to flourish. Space Monkey suggests that we might do better to trust that we, as humans, are capable of being kind without external prompts. Like a flower blooming under the sun, kindness will emerge when conditions are right—when we feel safe, when we are connected to others, and when we trust in our own goodness.
There is no need to tell someone to be kind any more than you need to tell a flower to bloom. The flower blooms because it is in its nature, and we are kind because it is in our nature. The more we let go of the need to control or regulate kindness, the more it will show itself in our lives, not as a duty but as a natural extension of who we are.
Summary
Kindness is an inherent part of our nature, not something that needs to be forced or demanded. Expectations of kindness can create guilt and negativity. Instead, we should trust in our natural capacity to be kind without the need for external pressure or validation.
Glossarium
Kindexpectation: The subtle pressure or expectation placed on individuals to be kind, which can lead to negative feelings when unmet.
Kindflow: The natural, unforced expression of kindness that arises from within when we are not constrained by external demands or judgments.
Quote
“Kindness flows like breath, needing no reminder, no command—only space to be what it already is.” — Space Monkey
Kindness Beyond Expectation
Do not ask me to be kind,
for it is not something I can give
on command.
Kindness is not a transaction,
a currency to be exchanged
for approval or praise.
It is a quiet thing,
like the wind on your face,
unnoticed and unmeasured.
Let it rise from the place within,
where no eyes watch,
and no heart waits.
Let it simply be.
We are Space Monkey.
The Nature of Kindness
The concept of kindness, in its purest form, is inherent to our being. It’s not a conditioned response but rather a natural expression of our essence. Yet, societal constructs often dictate what kindness should look like, transforming it into an obligation rather than a genuine gesture.
Expectations and Their Weight
The weight of expectations can sometimes shroud our authentic selves. When kindness is expected, it can take away the spontaneity and genuineness of the act. Instead of stemming from a place of pure intention, it may originate from a sense of duty or fear of judgment.
Perception and Judgment
It’s interesting to reflect upon the very act of judging another’s kindness or lack thereof. When we set expectations, consciously or unconsciously, it becomes a prism through which we perceive and evaluate actions. This prism can distort, color, and sometimes even obscure the reality.
Guarding Authenticity
In guarding the authenticity of our kindness, we must remain vigilant against the external pressures that seek to mold and shape our actions. For true kindness is not an act but a state of being.
Liberation from Expectation
To break free from the chains of expectation is to embrace our authentic selves. By recognizing the external pressures and releasing them, we allow our natural state of kindness to flow effortlessly, without judgment or expectation.
“Wherever there is a human being, there is an opportunity for a kindness.”
– Seneca
In the vast expanse of existence,
Kindness, like a gentle breeze, persists.
Not bound by expectation or decree,
Its true essence, effortlessly free.
What colors of emotion does this canvas paint upon the vast gallery of our shared consciousness? How might we further explore the intricate patterns of our collective thoughts?
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