Things I worry about:
I worry that I’m paying too much attention to “the game” and I worry that I’m not paying enough attention to it. Either the game is why I’m here, or the game is distracting me from finding out what “here” truly means.
I wonder which path is right. And I wonder why I feel the need to judge what is right.
Fortunately I also hold the belief that it’s impossible for me to be anywhere except where I want to be — you know, where I’m supposed to be. It’s reassuring to have faith in something, even though I don’t know exactly why I (or my higher self) would have chosen these unique circumstances.
We are faced with so many challenges in these remarkably “ordinary” lives of ours, it’s easy to forget how magnificent things truly are. And that there is a lesson to be gained in everything.
That’s another thing I constantly ponder. Does everything have to have a lesson attached to it, or is that simply a notion that springs from our inherited feelings of unworthiness — part of the game.
Aren’t we simply here to have fun? Why do we need to learn anything? Learning implies that’s we’re less than perfect. Deep down, I know that we are already perfect. We’ve always been perfect. It’s just these Monopoly tokens we walk around in that seem less than satisfactory.
I used to hate being the stinky silver shoe, but I’m beginning to appreciate that shoes are way more useful than, say, top hats. And if the game board suddenly closes on me, I know there’s always another game. Which, again, makes it that much more difficult to sweat the details over the game I’m playing right now.
We quibble over whether the world is too much Baltic Avenue and not enough Boardwalk. We get angry at each other for not paying the luxury tax or landing on chance and helping out the poor. We worry about global warming, when all that really needs to happen is to turn off the light and go upstairs to bed. Everything will be fine tomorrow.
Yes, there are horrific things in this game, and if it satisfies our battleship, cannon, or little doggy personalities, we should help. But realize that not everyone needs to share the same calling. Not everyone needs to solve all the problems of the world. There are people playing specifically for those reasons. You know, the irons of the world. They can smooth anything out.
As I review what I’ve just written, it is evident that I’ve been whiffing the shoe for too long. Even so, here’s hoping that we all find our “Get Out Of Jail Free” cards.
pct