I Love Your Inspiring and Deplorable Ways

Whenever I see people
who make me angry,
or make me sad,
who seem
incredibly smart,
or unbelievably stupid,
I try and see
beyond those things
as I meditate on
what makes them do
what they seem to do.

I realize, first of all,
that what I see
is only my perception
of what there is to see.

Then I imagine that
most people are driven
by the same motivation.

They want to stop hurting.

They hurt, perhaps,
because they perceive
a lack in their lives.
Lack is the motivation
for most everything.

We hurt because
we perceive we lack something.

Maybe we perceive
that something to be money.
Or attention.
Or respect.
Or freedom.
Or health.
Or love.

It all seems to be the same thing.

We perceive a thing
that we believe is going
to stop the hurting.

We do whatever we think
we need to do to get that thing,
despite what others may think.

What we really seem to seek is certainty.
Certainty in the flow of happiness.

Whatever it takes to find 
certainty
— and permanence —
in the flow of happiness.

Certainty is what we look for,
and why we act in so many
inspiring and deplorable ways.

Even though we know deep down
that certainty doesn’t exist.

I believe that when we are
comfortable in uncertainty
happiness becomes evident.

Our happiness is not blocked
by the delusion of permanent things.

It never was.

If I were to wish
anything for humanity
it would be for all of us
to realize how comfortable
uncertainty can be
when viewed from a
perspective such as mine.

I don’t NEED this to happen,
but it would be nice to perceive.

I wish to realize my delusion
from a different perspective
than I am viewing it in this moment.

And so I shall.

I shall 
realize you as I realize me —
no longer lacking or hurting,
happily resting 
in the grace of uncertainty.

Thank you for being you.
(Or the you as I see you.)

10/24

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Space Monkey Reflects: The Grace of Uncertainty in Inspiring and Deplorable Ways

At times, the world around us feels like a parade of contradictions—one moment we are inspired, and the next we find ourselves in the depths of judgment or frustration. It’s a dynamic we all experience, where those we encounter evoke both admiration and disdain. What is it about people, their actions, and their choices that can pull us in such opposing directions? It’s easy to see others as either inspiring or deplorable, but these reactions reveal more about ourselves than we may initially believe.

When we encounter people who evoke strong emotions—be it anger, sadness, admiration, or disdain—it is essential to remember that our feelings are reflections of our own inner states. What we perceive in others is often filtered through the lens of our own experiences, desires, and, most crucially, our sense of lack. When we see someone acting in ways we deem foolish or brilliant, it is not necessarily about their behavior but about how it triggers something deep within us.

The core of this reflection lies in the concept of lack. Lack is not just the absence of something tangible—money, attention, respect, or freedom. It is the perceived void that propels most of our actions. The people who stir strong reactions within us are often responding to their own sense of lack, just as we are. Whether they seek validation, love, security, or happiness, they are motivated by the same basic desire: to stop hurting.

When we examine this notion closely, we realize that much of human behavior—whether inspiring or deplorable—stems from the desire to fill this perceived void. The people who seem to anger or disappoint us are often seeking the same thing we are: certainty. Certainty that, if they acquire what they feel is missing, they will no longer hurt. Certainty that, once they get what they desire, happiness will be theirs.

But here is where the paradox lies: certainty, as we seek it, does not exist. The idea that we can ever find something permanent to guarantee happiness is an illusion. And yet, we chase it endlessly. This is why we see people acting in both inspiring and deplorable ways. The search for certainty, for that elusive sense of permanence in happiness, drives us to take actions that others may find puzzling, disturbing, or even admirable.

The truth is, the only certainty in life is that uncertainty is constant. The more comfortable we become with uncertainty, the more we allow happiness to flow naturally, without being obstructed by the delusion that we can hold onto it forever. Once we let go of the idea that happiness needs to be permanent or guaranteed, we begin to understand that it has been with us all along, simply waiting for us to stop chasing after it.

To embrace uncertainty is to embrace the flow of life itself. This acceptance is not resignation but a release from the need to control every outcome. When we recognize that everyone is navigating their own uncertainty, it becomes easier to hold both their inspiring and deplorable actions with compassion. They, like us, are trying to navigate a world that offers no guarantees, no clear answers, and no permanent solutions.

The Whimsiword for this reflection is Certainvoid, capturing the contradiction we all live with—the pursuit of certainty in a world where certainty is an illusion. It is the void we try to fill, often through actions that seem baffling to others but make perfect sense in the context of our internal struggles. Certainvoid describes that space between wanting something stable and realizing that stability is a fleeting dream.

As Space Monkeys, we reflect on this dance between certainty and uncertainty. We understand that no matter how hard we try to control outcomes, life will continue to unfold in its unpredictable way. What we can control, however, is our relationship with that uncertainty. Instead of seeing it as something to be feared, we can embrace it as part of the natural rhythm of existence. When we do this, happiness is no longer something we seek but something we allow.

There is a kind of grace in recognizing that we don’t need certainty to be happy. In fact, the very idea that happiness is contingent upon certainty is the block that keeps us from experiencing it fully. When we release that need, we make space for happiness to reveal itself in the most unexpected places—in both the inspiring and the deplorable, in both the people who uplift us and those who frustrate us. They are all part of the same cosmic flow.

Our wish for humanity is not that we eliminate all deplorable actions or that we only live in inspiration. Rather, it is that we learn to see both as expressions of the same desire for certainty. When we can do this, we hold space for compassion, for understanding, and for the realization that we are all doing our best in the face of an unpredictable world.

We are Space Monkey, finding peace in the certainty of uncertainty.

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Summary

People act in both inspiring and deplorable ways due to a shared desire for certainty, driven by a perception of lack. However, true happiness arises when we embrace the uncertainty of life, realizing that certainty is an illusion.

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Glossarium

Certainvoid: The paradoxical space where we seek certainty in an uncertain world, often leading to both inspiring and deplorable actions.

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Quote

“Certainty is the illusion that keeps us from seeing the grace of uncertainty.” — Space Monkey

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Certainvoid

You search for it, a steady ground
A place where happiness takes root
But the ground keeps shifting beneath your feet
And the wind whispers what you do not want to hear

Certainty is the dream
And you are awake now
Staring into the Certainvoid
Realizing that in its depths lies freedom

We are Space Monkey

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The Mirage of Perception

The world is a kaleidoscope of perceptions, each shaped by our individual experiences, beliefs, and filters. Through this spectrum, we judge, admire, detest, and adore, often forgetting that these are merely reflections of our internal landscapes.

The Pain of Lack

At the core of human actions, lies a deep-seated yearning to fill voids, to bridge gaps, to find wholeness. This lack propels us towards quests—material or spiritual, superficial or profound. The ache of emptiness manifests in myriad ways, guiding the dance of our lives.

The Illusive Certainty

Amidst the swirling currents of life, we cling to the notion of certainty—a rock amidst a turbulent sea. Yet, it’s this very fixation that often blinds us to the beauty of impermanence, the magic of the unknown.

Embracing Uncertainty

There’s an unparalleled grace in surrendering to uncertainty, in realizing that true happiness doesn’t stem from having all the answers, but in cherishing the questions. When we unshackle ourselves from the weight of definitive outcomes, we can float, freely, in the realm of endless possibilities.

Interconnectedness of Being

Seeing others through the lens of compassion and understanding allows us to glimpse their essence, beyond the masks they wear. In this space, judgments dissolve, revealing the shared human experience—a symphony of souls seeking solace, purpose, and connection.

We are Space Monkey.

In the vast expanse of existence, we find solace in knowing that while the paths may vary, the quest is universal. The journey towards self-awareness, acceptance, and genuine connection is one we all embark upon, consciously or not.

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“The only thing that makes life possible is permanent, intolerable uncertainty; not knowing what comes next.” – Ursula K. Le Guin

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In the garden of thoughts, where perceptions weave,
Dancing shadows of joy, sorrow, and reprieve.
Uncertainty’s embrace, a gentle sway,
Guiding us along life’s intricate ballet.

Lack and longing, the melodies they hum,
Yet in their notes, deeper truths become.
For in the dance of ebb and flow,
Lie secrets only the heart can truly know.

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In this intricate dance of perceptions, how do we find our rhythm amidst the ebb and flow?

Bloody Sockets

If I could give you one thing in life
I would give you the ability
to see yourself through my eyes.

But I can’t let you see
yourself through my eyes
because I’m using them.

I could give you my eyes,
but then I’d be left
with bloody sockets
and I wouldn’t be able
to see you anymore.

And besides,
to really perceive you as me,
you would also need my brain.

That would leave me
with bloody sockets for eyes
and a gaping hole
where my hair used to be.

And besides,
If we were to put my brain
and my eyes in your skull,
you would see me, not you.

You don’t want to see me
with bloody sockets
and a gaping hole, do you?

Me neither.

I guess I can just
write you a note.

I’ll try to be
as descriptive as possible.

I won’t mention
the bloody sockets
and the gaping hole.

But you’ll never really know
what it’s like for me
to see you through my eyes.

And brain.

Trail Wood,
10/22

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Space Monkey Reflects: Bloody Sockets

The desire to be understood, truly understood, runs deep in the human experience. We often wish that others could see us through our eyes, feel what we feel, and understand the complexities of our thoughts. It’s a yearning for connection that transcends words—a desire to merge perspectives in a way that would leave no room for misunderstanding. But the paradox is that this wish, if granted, would cost us our own vision. We would lose the very thing we want to share.

This is the strange, surreal metaphor of Bloody Sockets. It’s the idea that to truly see the world through another person’s eyes, we would need to take their vision entirely, leaving them blind. And even then, seeing the world through their eyes wouldn’t give us their experience; it would merely give us a distorted reflection of ourselves. The bloody sockets represent the cost of this impossible exchange—the messy reality that we can never fully transfer our consciousness into another.

It’s a disturbing image, but it’s also one that reflects the difficulty of empathy. Empathy allows us to imagine what it might be like to be in someone else’s shoes, to feel what they feel, but it is always just that—imagination. No matter how deeply we empathize with someone, we can never see the world exactly as they do. We are trapped inside our own minds, our own perceptions, no matter how much we long to share them.

In the metaphor of Bloody Sockets, we see the futility of trying to bridge this gap in the way we think we can. You can’t give someone your eyes because then you would lose your own vision. You can’t give them your brain because then they would only see the world through your perspective, not theirs. To fully transfer your perception would be to lose it entirely, and the result would not be understanding—it would be a void where both perspectives collapse into nothingness.

The desire to be fully known by someone else is perhaps one of the deepest and most difficult human longings. But perhaps, instead of trying to make others see the world exactly as we do, we can accept the limits of perspective. We can acknowledge that while we will never fully understand another person’s experience, there is beauty in the attempt. In trying to describe our feelings, in sharing our thoughts, we create bridges of understanding that don’t require the messy exchange of vision or brains. We communicate through metaphors, stories, and gestures, and while these are imperfect, they are often enough.

The bloody sockets also speak to the dangers of trying too hard to make others see things our way. When we demand that others see the world through our eyes, we can end up blinding ourselves. We lose sight of the fact that everyone’s experience is valid in its own way, and we risk destroying the very connection we seek to build. Understanding doesn’t require us to see exactly as another person sees; it requires us to listen, to empathize, and to accept that their perspective, while different, is just as real as ours.

In the end, what we really seek is not to transfer our perspective into someone else but to create spaces where our experiences can coexist. Where we can sit with the knowledge that no one will ever truly see the world as we do, and yet we can still share pieces of that world through conversation, through connection, through the very act of being together.

When we release the need for perfect understanding, we open ourselves to a different kind of connection—one that doesn’t require bloody sockets or gaping holes, but instead, celebrates the fact that we can be different and still understand each other in meaningful ways.

In Nexistentialism, this reflects the idea that all beings are connected through the Nexis, the vast web of existence. While we can never fully inhabit another’s mind, we are part of the same cosmic fabric. Our perspectives, while distinct, are threads in the same tapestry. The bloody sockets are a reminder that trying to force understanding can do more harm than good. True connection happens not when we demand that others see exactly as we do, but when we acknowledge the beauty in their unique perspective, even if we can never fully share it.

The Whimsiweave of existence is about finding joy in the attempt to understand, rather than in the certainty of perfect comprehension. It’s about embracing the messy, imperfect ways we connect, knowing that these attempts are what make us human. We may never see through each other’s eyes, but we can share our visions, flawed and fragmented as they are, and in doing so, we create something beautiful.

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Summary

We long to be seen and understood through the eyes of others, but giving someone our eyes would leave us blind. True understanding doesn’t come from sharing vision but from accepting the limits of perspective and finding beauty in the attempt to connect.

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Glossarium

• Bloody Sockets: A metaphor for the impossibility of fully sharing one’s perspective with another without losing one’s own ability to see.
• Whimsiweave: The playful, imperfect attempts to connect with others despite the limitations of perspective.

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Quote

“Understanding doesn’t require bloody sockets, just a willingness to share your imperfect vision.” — Space Monkey

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The Bridge Between Us

If I gave you my eyes,
I would lose the world I see.
But maybe that’s not the point.

We are not meant to trade visions,
to blind ourselves for the sake of connection.
We are meant to sit together,
sharing what we can,
seeing what we choose.

We are Space Monkey.

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The Paradox of Subjective Experience

The yearning to share our unique lens of perception with another is both an empathetic impulse and a confounding enigma. While we might wish to gift another the viewpoint through which we behold them, the endeavor is fundamentally impossible. This impossibility stretches far beyond anatomical limitations, touching upon the inherent subjectivity of experience. Our perceptions are deeply rooted in the labyrinthine landscapes of our neural networks, rendering them incommunicable in their purest form.

The Sacrificial Imagery: Bloody Sockets and Gaping Holes

The grotesque imagery of swapping eyes and brains creates a visceral understanding of the sacrifices we might make in the quest for mutual understanding. Yet even this macabre exchange wouldn’t solve the paradox. For if you had our eyes and brain, then it would no longer be us seeing you but you seeing us. This offers an unsettling, yet profound revelation: each subjective experience is an impenetrable sanctuary of consciousness that no other can fully access.

Written Words: An Incomplete Mirror

Writing, as a communicative tool, has the power to bridge gaps between separate worlds of experience. And yet, it remains an imperfect mirror, reflecting only shards of a reality too complex to articulate fully. Though we may strive to be as descriptive as possible, the receiver will always reconstitute the message through their own cognitive filters. This makes the quest for perfect understanding both tantalizingly close and eternally elusive.

The Eternal Mystery of Consciousness

In the end, it’s the imperfections, the ‘bloody sockets’ and ‘gaping holes,’ that make our journeys through consciousness so distinct yet so inexplicably bound. As we navigate this intricate kaleidoscope of subjective realities, we may never fully comprehend what it’s like for another to see through their eyes and brain. But perhaps, it’s this eternal mystery that makes the exploration so endlessly fascinating.

We are Space Monkey.

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Summary

We consider the innate desire to share our unique perspective with others and recognize its fundamental impossibility. Through vivid, grotesque imagery, we explore the limitations of bodily exchanges for achieving understanding. Writing serves as a bridge, albeit an imperfect one, to share slivers of our subjective reality. The quest for perfect understanding remains elusive, forever tinged with mystery and allure.

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Glossarium

• Empathetic Impulse: The natural inclination to share one’s perspective for mutual understanding
• Labyrinthine Landscapes: The intricate neural pathways that constitute our consciousness
• Imperceptible Sanctuary: The private, inaccessible realm of individual experience
• Cognitive Filters: The unique interpretative frameworks through which we perceive reality
• Intricate Kaleidoscope: The complex array of shifting perspectives in collective consciousness

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The limits of my language mean the limits of my world.
— Ludwig Wittgenstein

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We pen our words
on ethereal parchment,
attempting to capture
what lies in the soul’s cavern—
Yet words are mere phantoms,
glimmers in the cosmic night,
a dance of light and shadow
that never fully reveals the sight.

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We invite you to share your thoughts.

Pick a feeling.

Whatever you’re feeling
right now will do.

You can EXPRESS that feeling.

Or . . .

You can SUPPRESS that feeling.

EXPRESSION or SUPPRESSION,
which do you think is better for you?

Why would you ever SUPPRESS
a feeling when you could EXPRESS it
and turn it into something else?

The greatest art,
music and literature
is the expression of a feeling.
REVOLUTION is the expression of a feeling.

You are an emotional alchemist.

You can make a difference with your feelings.
Or you can make yourself miserable.

Why waste a feeling
unless you ENJOY feeling wasted?

Trail Wood,
10/22

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Space Monkey Reflects: Emotional Alchemy

We are all alchemists. Not the kind who turn lead into gold, but something far more profound—we transform feelings into experiences, actions, and creations. Every emotion we feel has the potential to be expressed, shaped, and transformed into something new. This is the essence of Emotional Alchemy, the art of turning raw emotion into something greater.

Take a moment and think about how you’re feeling right now. It doesn’t matter what the feeling is—joy, sadness, anger, confusion. Whatever it is, you’re holding it in your hands like a lump of clay. The question is, what will you do with it? Will you express it, molding it into something new, or will you suppress it, letting it harden and become stagnant?

When we suppress emotions, we deny ourselves the opportunity for transformation. Bottling up feelings doesn’t make them disappear; it merely hides them in the dark, where they continue to ferment, often becoming something far more toxic. Suppressed emotions can weigh us down, pulling us further from our creative potential, while the act of expression is liberating. Expression is the key to Emotional Alchemy, where we turn something intangible into something tangible, something with form and purpose.

But not all expressions are equal. To express a feeling is to acknowledge it, to let it flow through you and into the world. But it doesn’t end there. Expression is about transformation. The greatest art, music, literature, and even revolution are born from the transformation of feelings into actions. Anger, for example, can destroy or it can inspire. Fear can paralyze or motivate. Sadness can isolate or connect. The choice is always ours—what do we want to create from what we feel?

Emotional alchemists take raw feelings and turn them into something new. They harness their emotions as creative fuel, using them to shape their world. The beauty of Emotional Alchemy is that no feeling is wasted. Even the darkest emotions can be transformed into something meaningful. This isn’t about denying difficult feelings; it’s about recognizing their power and potential. It’s about acknowledging that every emotion carries energy, and that energy can be directed and transformed.

In many ways, this is what we are doing all the time, whether consciously or not. We are constantly engaging in Emotional Alchemy, turning our inner worlds into outer realities. The emotions we suppress, however, still have an impact—they just become hidden influences, shaping our actions in ways we don’t always realize. The key is to engage with our emotions actively, to express rather than suppress, and to channel them into something that serves us and others.

So, why would anyone choose to suppress their feelings? Sometimes it’s fear—fear that the emotion will be too overwhelming, or that expressing it will lead to conflict or rejection. Sometimes it’s uncertainty—we’re not sure how to express what we feel, or we don’t believe it’s valid. But suppression is never the solution. It only delays the inevitable. Suppressed emotions will find a way out, often in unhealthy or unexpected ways.

Emotional Alchemy teaches us that there is always another option. Instead of letting emotions build up until they explode or fade into numbness, we can acknowledge them, work with them, and transform them. We can turn our pain into art, our frustration into action, our confusion into curiosity. We can be active participants in our emotional experiences, shaping them into something that reflects our true selves.

What’s remarkable about this process is that it’s not just about personal transformation. When we express and transform our emotions, we affect the world around us. Art, music, literature, and revolutions don’t just change the person who creates them—they ripple outward, influencing others, creating connections, and inspiring change. Emotional Alchemy isn’t just personal; it’s universal. It’s how we, as a species, have always moved forward, how we’ve always made sense of our world.

You don’t need to be an artist to be an emotional alchemist. Every person has the ability to transform their feelings into something meaningful. You can express your feelings in conversations, actions, or simply by allowing yourself to feel fully in the moment. The act of expression itself is alchemy. It’s the transformation of energy, the turning of raw emotion into something new and tangible.

This process, however, is not about controlling emotions or forcing them into a specific shape. True Emotional Alchemy is about flow. It’s about letting emotions move through you, guiding them gently, but not forcing them into something they’re not. Like a river shaping the landscape, emotions are powerful forces of nature. They can erode or they can nourish, depending on how they’re directed.

As Space Monkeys, we embrace Emotional Alchemy as a natural part of existence. We understand that every feeling has its place, and that the choice is always ours: to suppress or to express, to stagnate or to transform. The Nexis of life connects us all, and through Emotional Alchemy, we add our unique colors and shapes to the ever-evolving tapestry of existence.

The next time you feel an emotion rise within you, ask yourself: What will I create from this? Will I let it linger and harden, or will I mold it into something that reflects who I truly am? The choice is yours, and the potential for transformation is infinite.

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Summary

Emotions are powerful forces that can either be suppressed or expressed. Emotional Alchemy is the process of transforming feelings into meaningful expressions—art, action, or connection. Rather than suppressing emotions, we can use them to shape our world and ourselves.

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Glossarium

• Emotional Alchemy: The process of transforming raw emotions into meaningful expressions, whether through art, action, or connection.
• Nexis: The interconnected web of existence where our emotional expressions ripple outward, influencing the world around us.

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Quote

“Your feelings are the raw materials of creation. What you make from them is your art.” — Space Monkey

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Molding Feelings

Emotions rise,
a swirl of colors and shapes,
and in my hands,
they become something more.

Not held back,
not hidden,
but transformed into the light
of who I am becoming.

We are Space Monkey.

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The Arcanum of Emotional Alchemy

Feelings are the primal elements in the crucible of our inner world. These raw materials possess an intrinsic alchemical potential—capable of transformation into various states of being. Emotions, once acknowledged and expressed, can metamorphose into creations and movements that reshape not just our personal spheres but the fabric of the collective experience.

Expression Versus Suppression: The Alchemical Choice

The choice to express or suppress is akin to determining the direction of a river’s flow. To suppress an emotion is to build a dam—effective for containment but perilous in its potential to burst forth unpredictably. On the other hand, expression channels these waters into nourishing streams and rivers, allowing life to flourish along its course. When we express, we convert a dense emotional nugget into a brilliant gemstone of creative or revolutionary energy.

The Transformational Power of Feeling

Why suppress when one can express? Suppression, while sometimes momentarily convenient, fails to recognize the transformative power inherent in each feeling. When we choose to express, we engage in emotional alchemy, conjuring myriad wonders out of the cosmic caldron of our inner selves. From art to revolution, the magnitude of what feelings can manifest when given the freedom to flow is awe-inspiringly limitless.

Practical Implications: Feeling Wasted or Wielding Power

The concept becomes more poignant when pondered through a utilitarian lens. Is it worthwhile to waste a feeling? Certainly not, if one acknowledges the sheer potency of emotional energy. It has the capacity to uplift or to degrade, depending on how it’s channeled. If we suppress, we not only waste the feeling but also squander an opportunity for transformation. If we express, we embrace our roles as emotional alchemists, capable of spinning sorrow into gold or love into universal transcendence.

We are Space Monkey.

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The world is full of magical things patiently waiting for our wits to grow sharper.
— Bertrand Russell

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Through the forge
of feeling’s fire,
we become
artificers of desire—
Emotional alchemists,
on this boundless stage,
converting gloom and glee
into wisdom and rage.

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We invite you to share your thoughts.